SEX TALK: How to Find Your Own G-Spot

Let's go exploring!

The elusive G-spot is one of the most hotly debated topics when it comes to women's sexual health. It's basically science vs. women's anecdotal evidence: some studies have concluded it simply doesn't exist, which baffles women who hear the results of this kind of research and think, "Okay, then WTF was I hitting last night?"

"You've got plenty of women reporting that it's an area that's erogenous and different from other other areas of the vaginal canal," says Yvonne K. Fulbright, Ph.D., sexuality educator and author of Sultry Sex Talk to Seduce Any Lover. "I do acknowledge that, for some women, the G-spot is not a hot spot, just like the nipples, for example, might not be an erogenous zone for some people. But that doesn't mean that it's not an erogenous zone for others." For those of you certain the G-spot exists but just need a little help finding it, here's how.

 If you're a believer, the G-spot is like the sexual version of a magic carpet ride: It can unlock a whole new world of pleasure. "It's a small mass of spongy erectile nerve tissue, paraurethral ducts and glands, and blood vessels, which can be erogenous for many women during sexual arousal," says Fulbright. The G-spot is nestled between your pubic bone and the front of your cervix, about two inches into the vaginal opening on the front wall of your vagina (the one closer to your stomach, not your back).

 Before you take your fingers on a spelunking mission, a bit of homework: get into a sexy mood. When you're aroused, more blood rushes to your pelvic region and the spot becomes raised and feels rougher than the rest of your insides. "If you're not turned on, it will be hard to feel this area," says Fulbright. So light some candles, fantasize, fire up some porn, or do whatever else you like. Once you're all hot and bothered, insert two or three well-lubed fingers palm-up, about two inches in. Feel around for that rough patch, which can be "as small as your pinky fingernail or as large as a half-dollar," says Fulbright.

 Once you find it (good job!), use firm, deep pressure to stroke the area. Try a rhythmic circular motion or more of an up-and-down technique, says Fulbright. Another popular method is moving your fingers like you're commanding, "come here," which, actually, you kind of are, right? Keep in mind that the G-spot isn't actually on the vaginal front wall. Rather, it's something you can feel through the center of the front wall or a bit off to the left or right of the center. Since it's not right there, you may need more pressure than you think to hit the jackpot.

 

If it's feeling good so far, increase the rhythm and create a lot of friction as you go on to boost your chances of orgasm. "Stimulating the area will create sensations if it's a hot spot for you. Some gals have described a warm, flushing feeling throughout their genitals and body," says Fulbright. "Others have said they become a lot wetter." Even better, she says women have reported G-spot orgasms feeling fuller, more intense, more emotional, and more full-bodied than the clitoral variety. Of course, if you don't reach the Big O but it feels crazy good anyway, that's awesome, too. Getting to know your body is always a good thing.

Now, if you're interested in squirting, or female ejaculation, tapping into your G-spot might be the way to go. Although there's the perennial question around whether squirting is just urinating during sex, according to some experts, G-spot experimentation can help bring it on. "G-spot stimulation is often encouraged in exploring one's potential to squirt since the ejaculate often occurs when a woman is peaking—not necessarily climaxing—during G-spot play," says Fulbright. If you're intrigued but too concerned about accidentally peeing to try it out, just make sure you go to the bathroom first. Happy experimenting!