If
a woman
goes
down on me, am I always expected to return the favor?
MIKE, DETROIT, MI
MIKE, DETROIT, MI
No, not always. We've seen that glaze in your eyes, and we
know what it means: You're seconds away from a post-orgasm snooze. Just don't
leave her hanging all the time, okay?
And if you're not into oral, don't expect her to give it
either. Find other ways to satisfy her. Once she's moaning, she probably won't
care if it's because of your tongue or your fingertips.
Should I tell my partner there's an old nude selfie of me
online? I'm worried she'll find it.
DANNY, CHARLESTON, SC
DANNY, CHARLESTON, SC
Lately, lots of people have learned the hard way that
megapixels don't always stay private.
If secrets bother you, then sure, fess up. Her reaction
(empathy? laughter? disgust?) could say a lot about your compatibility as a
couple. Otherwise, you'll just have to hope this secret stays between you and
Tumblr.
It probably will, but have your story ready just in case.
I need to relocate a few hours away for a new job. How do I
break it to her?
JUSTIN, MIAMI, FL
JUSTIN, MIAMI, FL
First, decide if your eagerness to move several zip codes
away says anything about how into her you really are. If you're still feeling
it, be direct and have a plan ready in case she freaks.
For instance, agree to take turns visiting each other at
least twice a month, and be patient. Hint at plenty of FaceTime fun. And to
really show commitment, use your raise to buy her an iPad, fill it with Friday
Night Lights episodes, and clip it to an intercity bus pass.
My girlfriend keeps saying she wants a puppy. Should I buy
her one?
JOE, BUFFALO, NY
JOE, BUFFALO, NY
Points for listening, but let's be clear: A puppy isn't a
gift. It's a commitment. Just because she oohs every time she sees a shih tzu
on the street doesn't mean she's ready to pick up puppy poop twice a day.
Like men, women want to bond with their pets; that's a
deeply emotional experience. And remember: If things don't work out, she's
stuck with a barking, shedding reminder of what went wrong.
So don't spring the pup on her. Wait until she's ready to
adopt—yes, adopt!—and be there, pooper-scooper in hand, when the right pooch
picks her.
I want girls to notice me at bars—but I don't want to look
like a douchebag. Any tips?
RAY, SAN DIEGO, CA
RAY, SAN DIEGO, CA
It comes down to this: No matter what you're wearing,
saying, or doing, don't try too hard. Women want a guy who's comfortable with
himself. It's why all those pickup artists are destined to fail.
Beyond that? Listen when she talks, and ask questions to
show you're paying attention. And don't underestimate the power of a good
story.
A guy once picked me up in a bar by telling me about the
time he fell off his bike as a kid—yeah, it was really random. Women generally
hate pickup lines (unless it's one of these 7 Cheesy Pickup Lines That Actually Work) but
most will stick around for a great story.
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