It’s infuriating when a colleague goes over your head to
your boss. Not only have they left you out of the conversation, but
they’ve potentially made you look bad. What can you do when someone
tries to sidestep you?
It’s best to take a measured approach. Here’s how.
1. Question your assumptions: Consider what you actually know. You may think your co-worker went over your head to spite you, but perhaps you’re misreading the situation. Look at only the facts and avoid snap judgments.
2. Find out more: If you don’t know all the facts of the situation, try to find out what really happened. You might go to your boss and ask in a neutral, non-accusatory way what transpired.
3. Approach your colleague: Ask your co-worker if the two of you can talk in private. Keep an open mind as you enter the conversation. Focus on your ultimate goal, whether it’s to restore trust or to protect your authority.
4. State your position: Begin by saying what you know and how you feel in a straightforward way. Then ask for — and listen to — his perspective.
5. Problem solve, together: Once you’ve shared your views with each other, decide together how to remedy the situation.
6. Clarify the lines of communication: You should also discuss how you’ll handle similar situations in the future. Ideally, you and your colleague will agree that she should come directly to you next time
7. Repair your relationship with your boss: Once you’ve settled things with your colleague, make sure to sit down with your manager to talk about what happened, why it happened and how to avoid similar situations in the future.
(Adapted from "What to Do When a Co-Worker Goes Over Your Head" at HBR.org.)
Harvard Business Review
It’s best to take a measured approach. Here’s how.
1. Question your assumptions: Consider what you actually know. You may think your co-worker went over your head to spite you, but perhaps you’re misreading the situation. Look at only the facts and avoid snap judgments.
2. Find out more: If you don’t know all the facts of the situation, try to find out what really happened. You might go to your boss and ask in a neutral, non-accusatory way what transpired.
3. Approach your colleague: Ask your co-worker if the two of you can talk in private. Keep an open mind as you enter the conversation. Focus on your ultimate goal, whether it’s to restore trust or to protect your authority.
4. State your position: Begin by saying what you know and how you feel in a straightforward way. Then ask for — and listen to — his perspective.
5. Problem solve, together: Once you’ve shared your views with each other, decide together how to remedy the situation.
6. Clarify the lines of communication: You should also discuss how you’ll handle similar situations in the future. Ideally, you and your colleague will agree that she should come directly to you next time
7. Repair your relationship with your boss: Once you’ve settled things with your colleague, make sure to sit down with your manager to talk about what happened, why it happened and how to avoid similar situations in the future.
(Adapted from "What to Do When a Co-Worker Goes Over Your Head" at HBR.org.)
Harvard Business Review
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