Episode 10: A Woman’s Tale – #AWT

I am Abimbola, a 33 year old lady from Ogun State. I was not so sure about posting this story, but I know sometimes positive things can emerge from unexpected places.

I am Muslim and from a pretty

much wealthy home. As an only female out of 5 children, my parents were fond of me and gave me everything I wanted and needed. This is how I grew up and I am grateful to God for this.

All my life, I have been in about 4 relationships and in each case, except the last, infidelity has been the regular order. I find it hard to understand why men wouldn’t just keep ‘that thing’ in place. There isn’t anything I haven’t given to a man to show how completely faithful and committed I can be, but nothing seemed enough.

Presently, I have a man I can actually say is different from any I have known – the fourth. I would withhold his name just for privacy sake. He is decent, from a humble Christian home and very intelligent. He makes me happy and loves me very much, I can confirm. I am actually four years older than him and more financially empowered than him, but that didn’t stop us; although, I have concerns majorly about other things.

Firstly, he works in a company that does not seem to pay much. His earning is quite low and honestly, it is not good enough to cater for our basic home requirements (I am not trying to sound spoilt) when we get married. I earn over 7 times what he earns. Secondly, my parents are insisting that I must not bring a man to the house if he isn’t a Muslim and from a respectable home (by that, I am guessing he meant well-to-do). Lastly, he wants to meet my parents and I am really scared of what this meeting can cause. I spoke with my brother about him and he told me I was joking. He said all sorts – he took it really personal and I am sure my father, not to mention my mother, would not even let me hear the last of it. I have been thinking about this for over a week, and I can’t even share my concerns with the guy I’m dating for fear of how he would feel.

I love him. We have only been dating 7 months, but I really do care about him. I am hoping there would be a miraculous twist to many of the things I am worried about. I thought of asking my dad to help him, but that could altogether jeopardize my whole long term plans with him aside from the fact that, financially helping him wouldn’t make him a Muslim. We have spoken about the difference in religion and he promised not to interfere with my decision on the subject (even after marriage).

I wish there is something I can do to make things work out. Please help me with an advice.

9jawomen