Feeling Rejected? Be Mindful!

Haters gonna hate, and you may have been a target, but that doesn’t mean you have to suffer the pain of rejection, according to the results of a small study published in the June 4, 2018 issue of Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience. The secret, according to the researchers, is the practice of mindfulness. These study results suggest that people who practice mindfulness techniques do not feel the same distress or pain of social rejection often experienced by those who don’t practice mindfulness and, as a result, they are better able than those not equipped with mindfulness skills to self-regulate anger and other harmful emotions that may otherwise surface in situations where they feel excluded.

The researchers define mindfulness as being open

and attentive to both internal and external stimuli as they presently occur, which simply translates to purposely paying attention to what you’re doing and thinking, how you’re feeling, and what is happening around you in the present moment, without any judgment. Rather than try to shut down negative and distressful feelings of rejection, the researchers suggest that those who practice mindfulness techniques may be able to prevent those distressful feelings from ever taking root.

The study included 40 undergraduate students, who reported their levels of mindfulness just before undergoing an MRI scan during which they played virtual games that resulted in conditions resembling exclusion and social rejection. The researchers followed up the scans with questions that helped determine each student’s feelings throughout the game and their levels of mindfulness. Those with the highest levels of mindfulness also reported feeling less concerned when they were excluded from the games.

Based on the MRI imaging, there also appeared to be a physiological basis for these observations. The researchers observed the students’ brain activity during the virtual games and, in those with higher levels of mindfulness, found less activity in a region of the brain involved in “top-down” inhibitory regulation of physical and social pain and in two areas of the brain that contribute to social stress. Less activity in these areas of the brain indicates that those with mindfulness skills were not trying to suppress their feelings, nor were they feeling the same degree of discomfort exhibited by those who lacked a strong degree of mindfulness.

Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) programs have been studied and found overall to have a significant positive effect on mental health, physical health, and quality of life, including social functioning. While it is unclear which aspects of mindfulness training are most effective for specific conditions, program techniques are primarily based on simplicity, contemplation, and meditation.

ABOUT AUTHOR 
Susan McQuillan MS, RDN, is a food, health, and lifestyle writer in New York City.