Does My Guy Friend Like Me?

There comes a time in almost every straight girl-guy friendship when something just a liiitle bit flirty happens, and you think, “Wait...does my guy friend like me?” And it can be incredibly hard to answer that question.

When you’re super-close with a guy, it’s difficult to tell if his actions are just him being a good friend, or a sign he’s trying to tell you that he likes you and wants to date you. And straight-up asking him how he feels often seems out of the question—you don’t want to make things awkward and potentially jeopardize the friendship you have.

That being said, if he’s doing any of the following, you may have more than a friendship on your hands.

1. He starts inviting you to hang more than usual.

Maybe you and your guy friend have always hung out regularly, but recently, he’s started inviting you to more parties than usual. That's a sign your guy friend might like you as more than a friend, says Dr. Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., professor at Oakland University in Michigan and author of Finding Love Again: 6 Simple Steps to a New and Happy Relationship.

2. He's making long-term plans with you.

If he’s making distant plans with you (whether it’s a group setting or one-on-one) for romantic weekend trips that are months away, it means he wants you in his life, and sees you being involved in those big moments, no matter how far out they are. "It’s a sign that he likes you when he starts talking about the future with you,” says Dr. Orbuch.

3. He’s started touching you more when you’re together.

Things used to feel platonic between you both, but now he’s grabbing your arm when you’re both laughing at a joke, putting his arm around your shoulders when you’re sitting at a restaurant booth, or putting his hand on your back as you walk into a room together. “This is definitely telling behavior,” says Orbuch.

4. You feel sexual tension every time you touch.

His touch might feel different to you too, like there’s a flirty, sexy tension that comes with it, unlike when you and other friends and family touch. He’s trying to show that he wants to be more than friends by taking the intimacy up a notch.

Sometimes body language can tell you everything you need to know about a relationship:

5. He’s been introducing you to more and more people in his life.

Your guy friend might like you if he’s invited you to meet his other friends, colleagues, or family. “It’s a sign he wants to show you off to others and wants the important people in his life to meet and spend time with you,” says Orbuch.

6. He wants to meet your family, too.

Same goes for asking about meeting your people. “He wants to be integrated into your life,” she says. 

7. He asks to see you…a lot.

If he’s trying to hang out more often, it could be a sign that he’s looking for more from your relationship. “You’ll notice that he’s increasingly demanding of your time, attention and emotions,” says Orbuch.

8. He wants to hang—just the two of you.

“It’s an especially big sign if he wants your hang outs to be one-on-one,” says Orbuch.

9. He talks about your friendship.

Look for times when your guy friend talks about your relationship with him. Does he like to remind you how unique it is? How close you are? How good you both are at being there for each other? How much fun you have together? It’s an indication that he really values what you two have, and isn’t afraid to share with you how special it is to him, says Orbuch.

10. He’s been texting/calling you more often.

If digital communication has picked up, that could be a sign your guy friend is into you. (Here's how to respond if you feel like things are getting flirty and you want to reciprocate.)

11. He's asking you more questions.

See if you notice a change in the types of conversations you have too—“He’ll likely ask more questions about you, how you're feeling and what you're doing,” says Orbuch.

12. Talking about your romantic lives feels kind of uncomfortable.

Does it seem like your guy friend doesn’t want to hear about your dating life? Or does he clam up when you ask about his romantic relationships? This may be a sign he likes you and wants you to see each other (and only each other) as romantic options. 

13. He roasts the guys you date.

Another sign? “He tends to be critical of the people you date,” says Orbuch. If your partners never seem good enough to him, it’s because he’s interested in you and protective of your feelings.

14. You share inside jokes.

If you and your guy friend basically have a secret language, share a ton of jokes that no one else gets, or reminisce about funny moments from the past, he might have more than friendly feelings for you, says Orbuch. Sharing jokes that have a “You just had to be there” vibe for everyone else is a way to create emotional intimacy between the two of you and bring you closer.

By Kristin Canning